the Final Hypnobirthing lesson, am I really prepared?

Weight: 60.9kg – I NEED to stock the house up with more food. like MEALS ..
Feeling: a little lonely coz the husband has been so busy at work ūüė¶


week18

Week 18: people have started noticing the baby bump! This week baby is a capsicum!


Today will be another post where the hypnobirthing series will continue since we finished our last lesson and I’ve actually got quite a bit to say about what we learnt .

SO – lesson first, commentary later yes?

I’m sorry that this post is coming in on a Monday. Sunday was a MAD day for the hubs and I. I brought the dog to the dog run all on my own this week and barely had enough time to get ready for my mother in law’s 60th birthday dinner. Husband was wat work, so had to scramble a bunch of things :/

I actually finished writing Hypnobirthing on Sunday, but didn’t get to do commentary til this morning…. but better late than never right? I know you guys love me ūüėČ

Xx


 Hypnobirthing РLesson 5

This week’s last and final lesson,¬†we learnt more about the actual birthing process on ground zero – labour(ing) day.

As usual we started off with some (semi-horrifying) videos that were kinda a bit creepy but weirdly educational at the same time

AbbyWhoaCool

it was very surreal. watching this weeks’ videos. It was about conscious birthing and bring aware of what’s going on while giving birth.

There was a mum who let her 2 toddlers watch her birth a baby – there’s NO WAY that I’m going to let me kids do that! I heard from a friend of mine that it can be downright traumatising if your kid is not in the right frame of mind, and how the hell are you going to control what a kid thinks.. I don’t want my children to be scarred for life watching something come out of my hooha thankyouverymuch.

Like I mentioned about all the other videos we watch, birthing is a pretty (if not VERY) GRUESOME event.

ketchup EVERYWHERE

so yeah, I don’t think I’m going to want my kids, actually I don’t think I want¬†ANYBODY to be watching my vajayjay when something has to come out of it.

Besides my husband of course. He put something in there, so he jolly well better keep me company while it’s coming out.MUAHAHAHAHA!!

But back to story proper, besides that mother, there was also an orgasmic birth and an open ocean birth.

Open Ocean Birth: so there’s this Russian midwife right, that brings her “clients” who are birthing mothers, to the damn Mediterranean to freaking give birth in the open water.

They sway their hips and with the support of 3 or 4 helpers around them, the baby is released from the womb into the shallows, just like a baby dolphin.

baby swimming

The videos of what came after the birth were really magical. About the babies being one with nature and how we are all born with the natural ability to swim because it’s exactly like that in the womb. but this picture will have to do to illustrate my purposes.

The most amazing part of all of this was that in order to get to the Mediterranean, they are leaving aside all medical assistance. The nearest hospital is apparently MILES away, and if there were special circumstances (complications) arising, and they were to notice this during birth, chances were that they wouldn’t be able to get the medical attention they needed in time.

But according to ze Russian midwife, there was 0% of this ever happening to all the mothers that she coached to birthing… Go figure.

Now the commentary part of this is – DA HELL, birthing blood + Open water…. they never hear about sharks before issit….

shark - LOVE ME

Orgasmic Birth: the woman freaking orgasms while in the throes of labour. Which as wondrous and impossibly unattainable as it may seem, was rather motivating!

I was actually rather stricken by what so many people say about the fine lines between pleasure and pain. And honestly it’s not only convincing¬†that it’s totally up to you to decide which side of the line you want to step into, but it’s entirely proven and believable!

ilikeit when they hit me

So yeah, something to fix my mind into. Technically you’re supposed to train your mind to relax during labour and when the surges come, you tell yourself that the “pains” are good. that it means your body is doing all it can for the baby to come. And that will help to calm your heart and your head and ease the baby from your body.

SO – ENJOY THE PROCESS OF LABOUR. ENJOY YOUR SURGES.

besides looking at birthing itself, we went through some of the positions we can take while going through labour – that is, IF the doctor even is going to allow you to move around when you’re in the hospital. Apparently a lot of doctors like to strap you down and keep you immobile and have the assumption that you should just stay put and suffer through everything.

but anyway, there are quite a number of positions that you can take up when you’re trying to get the baby to move downwards toward the opening of a whole new world – and largely the focus is on gravitational-assistance where you’re standing (with support) or on all fours etc.

Labour balls and birthing stools help a tonne too apparently so we have to remember to request one of those when we (eventually) decide on which hospital to get to.

labor-ball-by-cscott2006

One of the biggest reminders that we had in this week’s lessons was to really remember to get our birth plan done up so we can bombard our obgyn with questions and get him to endorse the birth we want for our baby.

Talking about the birth plan in a group this week made it a lot more REAL. It could be because the other couple doing the class with us (just one other couple, so it’s a super small class) is way further along in her pregnancy than I am. So this week when we saw them, I was like OMG you’ve grown so much in 2 weeks!

Not like I haven’t been growing also la, but when your belly is TOTALLY out there, it’s just so MAGICAL..

buddha kitty

We’ve also learnt there is actually a helluva lot of info in the HypnoBirthing book that we’ve really been too busy to get down to reading. A lot of what goes on in the lessons are actually written down in the book if we’d just find the time to read together.

As I’ve said, the husband has been really quite busy and although we try to squeeze in a chapter or 2 of reading together at night before beddy-byes, there are A ¬†LOT of chapters and so little time.

So as this concludes the last Hypnobirthing class, it looks like there’s still a lot of work to do.

I’ll update on the main blog page as we go along, but I hope that I’ve been helpful in highlighting the main points of the class that might encourage more ladies to go for this natural way of giving birth to their babies in a safe and CALM way.


Updates

Well. the last week of not having lessons was somewhat of a little eye opener for the husband and I. Not just in terms of being prepared for the birth of our baby, but also for being prepared for whatever is to come once the baby is out.

Maybe to put things a little into context is that we actually had a baby’s 1 month thingy for a close friend of ours so we were questioning ourselves on whether that’s really all we need to learn.

Somewhere in between the lessons last week, we were also questioning ourselves on whether we needed additional classes so that we would know how to handle the baby when we (see: me in particular) would have to physically carry the baby etc when my body no longer does.

yeah… not quite that easy for me

So we’ve decided that when we figure out which hospital we want, we’ll just sign up for baby handling classes so we can get the gist of bathing and carrying and breastfeeding that sort of thing…

But besides that., I am really starting to think the hypnotherapy bit is working quite well,¬†Or I’m totally getting tired enough to zonk out whenever the lulling *plink plink plink* sounds of the CD start coming on..

Still not quite sure about whether it’s the depression of genuine pregnancy tiredness because I was never one to take afternoon naps, but well…..

It hasn’t been an easy week for me ūüė¶ It’s been rather depressing by myself the majority of the time so I really looked forward to having the husband for all of Saturday to do class together.

gut-together-forever2

I know that it isn’t really his fault for not being around because he has projects to handle and the like, but sometimes i get pregnancy tantrum – I just want to be waited on a bit.

Like… Isn’t this my chance?

I know in the “OLDEN” days where girls stay with their in-laws after getting pregnant, and their mother-in-laws are like “Oh let me brew you this, and make sure you eat your birds’ nest.” and there are just people AROUND who are able to give you what the progeny of your loins desires.

And as they (sorta) should! After all, said loins are carrying the future of the (husbands’ surname)’s lineage!

fruit of my loins

fruit of my loins

anyway it really seems as though I’m in it alone a lot of the time. Lack of people and support is tough.. It really doesn’t help that I have to self motivate myself every day at home either.

Since you all know that I work at home, it’s safe to tell you that it really isn’t all just a walk in the park. I get rather antsy and fidgety because there isn’t someone to anchor my activity. There isn’t anybody to talk to and it’s really downright LONELY. The loneliness makes me feel very drained and tired all the time, and I’ve been having to take naps in the afternoon.

I’m not complaining about the naps per se. I mean I know a tonne of people who would kill to be able to take naps in the afternoon.

I wouldn’t exactly call it a luxury on my end though. Being self employed means being able to make decisions about what to do with your time… Like do i take a nap now and make up for the lost time later? or do i stay awake and do work now and then feel tired for the rest of the day.

It might seem like an easy decision for most of you 8 to 5 working people out there but trust me, when you realise that you’ve slept way past your allotted nap time and don’t have enough time to complete what you need to complete, THEN YOU WILL KNOW MY PAIN.

know my pain

ANYWAY, with the husband around over the weekend I do feel lots better, and part of that was reiterated in class over the weekend and as well as some of the conversations that we’ve been having about what we’re going to do once the baby comes out.

We’ve been talking about how we’re gonna cope with the baby in terms of feeding and splitting duties. Like would I have to express milk, when do we do it, who’s gonna do the night feeds if I’ve got the boobs… How are we gonna walk the dog when baby needs to be supervised 24-7. Can we get a helper who’s able to love our dog while we focus on the baby… what about the housework? How long are you going to be on leave to keep me and the baby company, what about parental leave?

Worst thing about everything is BECAUSE I’m self-employed, ¬†I don’t have any maternity leave to give him so that the hubs can spend more time at home with me…

I don’t know. a lot of things are up in the air.

But one thing is for sure. Love and Encouragement and Support is #1 on the list to make sure that you can get through everything.

Bffs!

It really boils down to the whole matter of whether we’re really prepared for this baby.

I truly would like to think that we’re getting there. But all signs point to the fact that we’re hopelessly far behind.

One thing that I remember reading a while back and I hope that this stays an encouragement to anyone else who’s feeling the same depression and helplessness that I’m feeling when you think about welcoming the baby into the world and all the responsibilities that come with, is this:

“Motherhood is a work in progress. You have nine (ten) months to prepare for some aspects of it, but won’t understand what it feels like to be a mother until you have taken your child out of the hospital and into your home….¬†

…You just love away and hope for the best – all the while coming to the stunning realization that this unbelievable love you have for your baby could just possibly be how your mom felt about you!”

– Pg 70, The Girlfriends’ Guide to Pregnancy

And with all that said, I continue to hold steadfast and strong as we embark into the deep end of expecting a baby. And again, I’m just glad that I have a loving and wonderful husband who tries his best to be there for me when he can.

Loving the people that love me,
Jess

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